Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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