By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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