none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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