Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
