Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
