sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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