Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
