I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
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