No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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