I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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