ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Randomize
