I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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