i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
