Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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