it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Randomize