I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
