you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
