Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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