My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
We need to rekindle our bromance
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize