i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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