the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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