I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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