Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
