I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
