i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
