gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
