I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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