I'm so fucking centered right now
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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