ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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