Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
