I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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