I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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