At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
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