Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
