pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize