I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
