i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
