Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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