I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
