is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
