She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
Randomize
