it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
