I wannas sexs uuuuu
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
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