I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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