Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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