they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize