More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
