Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
