okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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