Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
