We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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